Do you want to change or design your next life chapter, but feel like something is stopping you? Or perhaps you already know you have beliefs that are getting in the way.
From the moment we take our first breath on this wonderful planet we have life experiences. And each moment of each day, we develop meaning around those events.
As we grow up we see, hear and feel situations around us. We might hear a conversation between our parents or grand parents. Or a significant role model may say something to us.
We also notice the actions of those closest to us. Observing how they do things in a certain way and the reasons they give us for doing those things.
You may decide that you will always do it the same way or you might become determined to do the opposite. Whatever choice you make it is simply a reflection of the meaning and belief you created around those experiences.
This can work greatly in your favour. But it can also seriously get in the way of you creating the life you want and deserve.
How limiting beliefs show up
For example; as a child you may have noticed your grandparents retire at the age of 60. Maybe they didn’t do much with their time after that other than visit family and potter around.
As you reach your 50’s you develop a yearning to do something new. Possibly start a new business or career, or get involved in a new creative project. But there’s a part of you that keeps telling you it’s not possible, that you’ve left it too late or don’t have enough time. And because of this you keep procrastinating or you can’t even see how to get started.
Here’s another example; as you were growing up you may have had a teacher who told you that you weren’t creative.
In adulthood you choose a career to pursue and you become aware of the perfect role, but it requires you to be creative at times. Because of what you experienced in childhood and the belief you took on, you don’t apply for the role. And then you look back later in life and wish that you had.
Our beliefs can really limit us at times!
The thing is beliefs are just stories we choose to tell ourselves. And when we decide to change the stories our life potential begins to really open up.
I’m a big believer in reincarnation, but we only get the one shot at this particular lifetime. Each minute that ticks by is gone forever. We only get one opportunity to live that minute to its absolute best.
Your life is valuable, each and every moment, and you deserve to have amazing experiences. That’s why it’s important to arm yourself with the awareness and resources to know when you have beliefs that are getting in the way.
Why fear is a clue you have unsupportive beliefs
Fear is the biggest culprit of us not creating the life we want and deserve and there is almost always a limiting belief sitting behind it.
Often we might have a brilliant idea that comes out of the blue. We feel excited about it but we don’t act on it immediately.
We wait to have a think about it first, before we take the leap. And this is where we can be our own worst enemy, because that’s when fear can show up.
As we mull it over, we think about all the “What ifs” and what could go wrong.
What if it doesn’t work?
What if I make a fool of myself?
What if no one likes me?
What if I fail?
Yes it is important to look into this to see if your idea is viable, especially if you are taking a big risk. But to do this from a highly resourceful perspective into how you would handle a possible negative outcome.
And this is only so you can create a contingency plan; it’s not meant to stop you in your tracks.
1. Go down the “what if” rabbit hole
I say go down that “what if” rabbit hole and look into those imagined catastrophes. This is purely to find the belief that is getting in the way so you can change it.
Ask yourself what you’re afraid of and what it would mean to you if it didn’t work out the way you want it to. What would you negatively believe about you?
Keep digging until you find the belief. It is quite liberating when you do.
2. Always remember we are never dealt anything we can’t handle
You may have heard this before and that’s because it is true. Everything in life we have experienced has eventuated because we are able to handle it.
Once you have looked at the worst-case scenario, ask yourself if you could handle it. I’m sure you can bet your bottom dollar you could. And the thing is it more than likely won’t happen that way anyway.
Decide now what the meaning will be if it doesn’t work out the way you want it to. Instead of it being about you failing, what else could it mean?
Maybe it’s just that the experience has provided a platform for you to move to the next step.
3. Take on new beliefs that support you
Our beliefs create the platform for us to leap from. This means we can stay stuck if we continue to hold onto any unsupportive stories.
Become a determined belief hunter, flush out and change beliefs that no longer serve you. Create new beliefs that will support you in designing the life you love.
If you find a limiting belief, say for example; “I am not good enough” or “I’m not worthy” or “I’m too old” or “I’m not liked”, just change it.
This process can truly be that simple.
Write a new belief that will support you, then place it somewhere you will see it often. Remind yourself of it everyday and consciously make choices with the new belief in mind.
Final word
Please treat this like a work in progress. Remember many of our most limiting beliefs we have held for years.
It’s not going to take you that long to change them, but it is a process and there may be times when you slip up. Be gentle with yourself.
This is a journey in awareness, which is 95% of the change. It’s okay to slip up and even having the awareness that you have slipped up means you are 95% there.
If you still feel stuck and would like to move through this process much faster, working with an NLP practitioner and coach will help. You can book a time for a complimentary session here.